FOKN Frustration, Operations n Complications
I'm frustrated, so bloomin' fokn frustrated!
Yes, I am happy to be alive and thankful & grateful for every day however I am sooo frustrated & on the edge of being vexed.
Today it is the fact that it does not look like I will be able to go to the London screening of Coz ov Moni 2 this week. Link for details > https://www.picturehouses.co.uk/film/Film_Africa_Uk_Premiere_Coz_Ov_Moni_Ii_Fokn_Revenge_Q_A/
I should be there, I would like to be there, yet it is unlikely I will be there. THAT is why I am frustrated.
The blog I did in September will help you understand my frustrations. > http://ramblesfromarainbow.blogspot.co.uk/2013_09_01_archive.html
When the blog was shared there were a few people who were 'non-believers' of the story. That is okay, I was expecting that.
Then there were others who said I only wrote it to promote the fact that Mensa had a show in London that week. I also expected that.
Someone said I didn't turn up to Mensa show as I was scared after sharing my blog!! haha..I expected that too....
Another person was saddened by the fact that I mentioned SOME people from Ghana say nothing good comes from their country..they then did NOT share my blog but copied it & put it in their own blog, possibly thinking that I would not see this and the comments that followed. . . but I did.....cos I expected that...
There was a comment that said "FOKN Fairytale"...haha I LOVED that cos it made me laugh......
Anyway....THEN I got ready to go to the Mensa show.
Special ecg electrodes & pads attached to my chest. Special as they have extra stick cos at the last show I danced & got so hot that I sweated them off!! (Yep, always a good night of music whenever an event is organised by Focus Organization https://www.facebook.com/pages/Focus-Organization/224250857613337?ref=tn_tnmn ) So these ones I got especially for the occasion so they would stay stuck on!
I was boosted by the fact that his shows are like medicine to my soul.
I walked to the tube station, with a semi bounce in my step, Wanlovs 'foot' in my pocket (another story), a bracelet for Y & a letter. I tried to ignore that I felt a bit odd.
I was on my own as my mate T had a family crisis to deal with and could not attend at the last minute.
As I approached the ticket barrier it blurred, everything went to a dead sound in my ears, all energy suddenly sapped, I felt the pause, the loooong pause in my heartbeat...the sweat instantly running down my brow...my legs buckled.....
Yep, with a smile I gripped the TFL mans arm and said "I'm going down".
I 'went down'/collapsed at the tube station. Kerpow! I like to think I did it with style, as stylish as you can be in that situation.
After a few minutes I was okay again thanks to kindness, water & ecg readings & the fact my heart boosted back in. A complete stranger took me home after I assured him I did not need an ambulance. Obviously they are no longer a stranger & this is something positive to come out of it. His wife has since come & made me a cuppa tea. She sang to me. Nice.
So needless to say I never got to that show.
The dude who took me home helped me send a text message to Mensas team. I was then very kindly sent a lovely video clip of Mensa sending me good vibes on stage. This touched my heart, there was something in particular that further touched my heart about the clip. Thank you to all who sent good vibes, thank you. I really do appreciate.
It was a hazy blur of hospitals for a while, I remember being able to celebrate my Mums 70th Birthday. It was wonderful. Then a haze of hospital stays, getting worse and worse each time & staying longer each time I got admitted. Scary to be honest.
Finally I had an operation. Yep they finally did it on 16th Oct 2013. I'm still not 'fixed' but we are closer than we were to fixing me. Thank you NHS. Yep, here I am on the morning before the operation. Yep, That is a Mensa Mango Street t shirt..of course! >
There are pics of me after the op, and of the wound/scar. I really don't think these need to be seen right now, but they are there. In fact I'm kinda proud of the mark. It is healing well.
So I have been recovering. It has been slow & I had further complications so my time plan got messed up. I thought I would have bounced back by now.
This is also the week I had planned to go to Cameo Sessions at Sanctum Hotel, another music night, verrry stylish night, an acoustic night with the most amazing musicians and artists performing. It combined with an important Birthday celebration & a further celebration for my friend who received Londons Best Model award after much dedication. Ohhh I was gutted to miss it.
Then now to miss the screening of Coz ov Moni 2 is just annoying me. Ggrrrrrr, vexations!
Even if I feel reasonable on the day I know it is not wise to go as so far I have managed to go 200metres to the cornershop & back!
It says there will be a question and answer session with Fokn Bois after the screening. This is what I would really like to hear.
For the last few months through Twitter and Facebook, I have been seeing all sorts of comments & photos during the filming etc and the lead up. This has enticed me. I already have a list of questions. The controversy alone gets my brain buzzing. The clever wit, quick thinking puns on words, innuedos, I'm sure it will all be in there....and a moral, there wil be a moral to he story..hehe. I narrowed my questions down though, and this is before I have even see the movie!
Yes I do have a copy, a legal copy, of Coz ov Moni. (see pic at top) It's been watched many times for many reasons. Haha, we have had fun watching it...and every time my friend tells me I'm a good chef, well we both crack up laughing & bust out the lyrics...
So, I may not be there for the screening in Hackney .....Not because I am scared to show my face, not because I am just trying to hide, not because it is not real.....but because I am in my bed, in my bed suffering "Fokn Frustrations, Operations n Complications"....... ;)
